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When is It Okay to Argue with a Loved One Relying on Alzheimer’s Care?

Alzheimer’s Care Tarrytown NY

Alzheimer's CareTrying to support an elderly family member who has been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s means you are trying to care for them in the best way possible. In many situations it’s a mother or father or even a grandparent. One thing that is commonly talked about is avoiding arguments as much as possible when providing this type of support for somebody with Alzheimer’s.

The disease is going to affect memory and is also going to have a direct impact on a person’s ability to have a clear and cogent conversation. Your elderly loved one may begin to believe they are in a different time period, in a different place, and that can be unsettling at times.

Many professionals will advise these family caregivers to not argue with a person with this form of dementia. Even if that individual is planning to call a family member, friend, or other loved one who they haven’t seen in many years, who has long since passed away, it’s best to not try and correct them in certain situations and instead redirect them.

But what happens when the senior is frightened and paranoid?

They may look at their surroundings and not recognize it, even though they’ve lived in the same place, that same room, in that same bed for 10 or 20 years. If they have professional home care supporting them at times, they may not recognize this individual.

Is it okay to argue with them then? No one wants to see their aging mother or father be completely frightened and paranoid, believing somebody else is out to get them or they are in serious danger of being hurt. Trying to console them may not get you anywhere.

So what’s the right remedy?

Arguing with somebody in this particular frame of mind is not going to be the best situation. Acknowledging their feelings is the right step to take. Tell them you understand how they feel, even if they believe you are one of those who were out to get them. Be sympathetic and gradually try to nudge them in a different direction. Ask them if they’re interested in looking for a new bathrobe, new slippers, or something else that might be important to them.

It can certainly take time to get used to this, but if you get caught up trying to argue with them, it may only make matters worse.

For more information about how The Perfect Home Care, Inc. can help your aging parents remain in their own homes, call 917-399-5578.

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Geralyn DiGiovanni

Manager of Client Services at The Perfect Home Care, Inc.
Geralyn DiGiovanni has been marketing director of The Perfect Home Care since July, 2013. She’s responsible for promoting the agency by identifying and reaching out to market segments that align with the services offered by The Perfect Home Care. Among others, she works closely with geriatric care managers, elder care attorneys, and assisted living facilities. Her industry-specific experience includes multiple stints as a companion aide for seniors. She also has extensive experience in the publishing industry, where she worked as an account manager. “I love this industry and am passionate about working with seniors,” she says.